You can always go back again, even when it's tough

I don't like August.

August means it's closer to fall, which used to be my favorite season until (in the recent past) it became my favorite season to get sad. So, I survive with an intense focus on boots, sweaters, university hoodies, football, hockey, and pumpkin spice lattes. All of these are very good distractions, and I am thankful to be able to divert my attention to such (let's be honest here) mundane things.

August also means a return to work, which is very hard to do when you've been off for two and a half months. I'm not going to get into how I think school should be year round (but dammit, it totally should), but I will say this: I get really tired of hearing people who are jealous of my summer break.

It sucks.

There is no happy balance from mid-August to June. Your body clock gets all screwed up. You are working your ass off and then all of a sudden you're not doing anything. All of your best friends don't work in the same job as you do, and their schedules are totally different, which makes getting together a challenge. It's a difficult adjustment to make, both at the beginning and end of summer. You all with NORMAL, year-round jobs seriously don't realize how lucky you have it.

So, once August rolls around and I need to revert back to professional mode, it's tough. I see all the school supplies in Target and it makes me want to turn around and walk out (or at least run with my eyes closed and ears blocked through all the crazy moms and elementary school teachers just so I can get my shampoo and 12-pack of Coke Zero). I turn on my horrible, no good, very bad work laptop and lament the fact we can't get nice equipment (you know, Macs). I look at the pile of binders I brought home and SWORE I was going to revamp during the summer and just laugh and say, "Nope! Screw you, I'm still on vacation!" I watch a lot of television. I self-medicate on cookies and wine. I cry for no good reason. I use retail therapy as a crutch. I spend my waning days doing nothing because I won't have the chance to do nothing for a really long time.

But once I actually return to work and am in the building, I'm FINE. Things just fall into place and the old becomes the familiar once again. Routines take shape. I love what I do when I'm doing it (just not when I'm forced to sit through pointless meetings).

So, sorry, but I don't like August. Even though all the distractions are pretty good, it's not enough to hide the fact that life gets hard in August. But, I keep reminding myself that all of this is temporary. In the meantime, you can find me curled up on the couch, watching Friday Night Lights, drinking a bottle of French wine and eating cookies.